Why do I have to be the one to wait when everyone seems to get what they want? How patient do I have to be to get what I want? Or what I need?
To me, it’s similar to: ‘Sorry for your loss’. Are you really sorry for my loss? Do you have any idea how I feel?
This cliché stirs a lot of emotions. It expresses the way we look at work, or life in general. If you find yourself getting angry or upset when someone tells you to be patient, I think you need to ask yourself a few questions:
What is your ‘why’?
Why are you doing this thing that pisses you off when someone suggests that you be patient? What drives you? Maybe it’s time to stop. Maybe it’s time to pivot. Maybe it’s time to move on and let go. Maybe it’s time to think of the life you want to build for your loved ones and take a deep breath. Maybe you need a fresh dose of motivation.
How do you measure progress?
From other people’s timelines? From the amount of money you get from the activity? From likes and shares on the internet? From your amazon reviews? Is there a more sustainable and efficient way of measuring growth? Are you taking into account the impact you have in the community? Or that mentee who just won a scholarship thanks to your mentorship? Who are you doing it for?
What is the opportunity cost of being patient?
What would you rather be doing than working on this task or waiting for those results or gaining this skill? Who would you rather be? What are you sacrificing to accomplish this task? Your family? Your youth? Leisure? What are you willing to give to get what you want, and is it worth this pain?
I think anger is a reflection of a form of fear. We get angry that we we’re cheated on because we’re scared of something — maybe being alone or never being able to trust anyone.
If you get upset when someone tells you to be patient, you need to figure out what you’re afraid of and address the core.
Are you scared that you’re not good enough? Are you scared everyone is luckier than you and you’d never amount to anything and what your mom or dad said that one time would eventually be true?
We tend to express what is inside with speech or action. Fear would always find a way to come out.
Everything that’s worth it takes time. We all have different timelines. We all need each other. We all have something to bring to the table.
Don’t let anyone make you feel you are wasting your time.
Figure out what you’re scared of, address it.
‘Actions express priorities’ — Gandhi.
Do something daily that gets you one step closer to your goals. Taking time off to figure things out is as important as doing. Take a step back if you need to leap.
Be intentional. Be patient.
Hi. I’m Tchassa Kamga. I just moved to the U.S.A. from Cameroon.
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