“You tell man to return to where he was; you will change him back to dust. You carry us away like a flood; we last no longer than a dream”
— Psalm 90:3;5a
With a tire puncture and an unexplained car shaft shift, we were lucky to arrive the burial ground bathed in dust and various shades of sorrow.
At least, I got to see the Sabga Hills for the first time on my way to Bambalang-his final resting place.
And, I got to do a professional hitch ride job.
He was 27. I’ll be the same age in February. His wife and I went to High School together. I hear he was as soft spoken as she is.
I didn’t attend their wedding. But I saw on the pictures that she was elated. They had a child together. The little boy will only be told tales of his kind father.
He was the only one who died in the car accident. After his internship in Ebolowa, he was going to Yaounde to visit his wife and child. The others had injuries. He died 30 minutes after being rushed to hospital.
We were in the university at the same time, from what I gather. That must be where he met his wife. Maybe we walked passed each other. Maybe I stole his seat someday.
He won’t mind now though.
I remember where I was when I got the SMS. I wept. Then asked again to confirm. I didn’t know what to think at the time. I still don’t know what to think now. Moments like these reinforce the chord of unpredictability that glues humanity.
He did everything right. He completed a degree in Medical Laboratory Sciences. He was completing a Masters in Hospital Administration in one of the most prestigious institutions of the country. He got married to a very beautiful soul. He loved her. She loved him. His family loved him.
This is not just what people say when others die- they really did love him. And he was really a good person. I’d heard so before his death.
He won’t even watch his child grow.
I wonder what people will say when I die. Will you miss me? I wonder how I’ll die. It’s not just instances like these — even when I had my near death experience, I thought about this.
And I didn’t conclude much.
Life is life. The things we do, the words we utter, the people we touch ( or not), everything is unpredictable. Everything ends.
“Everything that has a beginning has an end”- Agent Smith, The Matrix Revolutions
If this simple truth isn’t enough to warrant self-improvement and working on whatever projects you’re still allowed to work on by virtue of your current state of being ALIVE…
If this simple truth doesn’t push you to make every conversation count…
If this doesn’t push you to forgive yourself when you mess up in order to step up…
Then, you might as well be dead.
I’m still in shock. My mind rationalizes everything. And this is definitely something that cannot be rationalized. I understand that I cannot make sense of this. That I cannot comprehend her pain. That this event isn’t something there will be an explanation for.
Yet, I try.