Sometimes, the hurt, and the way it’s expressed serves to distinguish when it’s out of love or pain.
I also think that forgiveness is not for the other person, it’s for us. We’re our harshest critics. If you’ve truly made your peace, if you’ve accepted that you did something wrong, paid your Penzance and moved on, it may not even sting a little bit.
And it that moment, you may realize that it’s they who are hurting. They who need you to remind them that you are(were) sorry.
If they choose to live in the past, you can’t do much. But they are with you now.
Imagine a woman who cheated and her man still stayed. He brings it up in a conversation. He’s remained a good man and maybe even a good father. His actions show that he’s not trying to give a cheap blow or anything.
In that moment, if I were the woman, I may see that he is still hurting. Even just a little bit. That maybe talking about it and letting me know the hasn’t forgotten is his way of working through his emotions.
But hey, that’s just my opinion 😉