This Is How You Lose Friends

It’s never been one ‘moment in time’. Oh, no.

It could take few seconds or months, or years. Eventually, you don’t recognise the exact moment it happened. You try to look back in time to pick that singular act- something said, done or undone.

Something. Anything.

But the fact is, you won’t find anything. Even though it had been there all along. You won’t find it because it’s a combination of thoughts, acts, and words. A hug here, a word there. A mixture of unseen decisions hidden in fake smiles and gentle nods in dark, brooding angles.

And just the way it started, this ‘evolution’, it could also end.
All it takes is to recognize the pattern. There is always a pattern.

Recognize it, or fail.

But one thing is certain : there is now something else. Something new. Something…different.

We don’t talk anymore like we used to.
He doesn’t reply my messages as fast as he used to.
The hugs don’t last that long anymore.
She doesn’t care when I don’t call her back.

She touches me when she laughs.
He opens the door for me now.
She smells different.
I really like him now.

The transformation is complete.

Interestingly, it happens for both situations:

A. Falling in love.
B. Losing a friend.

Change, is inevitable. Unavoidable. You can’t stop it. You might as well brace for it.

Now, when you see this pattern, what will you do about it? Because as unavoidable as change is, you can always steer it however you want.


Hi. I’m Tchassa Kamga. I live in Buea, Cameroon. I think better when I write. You?

Written by

Cameroonian writer and video creator. Featured in LEVEL and P.S. I Love You. I write about building relationships and personal transformation.

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